Monday, June 12, 2006

More Creationism Museum Fun

I recently was privileged to introduce to you Petersburg, Kentucky's pride and joy, the Answers in Genesis Creation Museum. I know you are revving the engines of the John 3:16-Mobile as we speak, but if you examine the museum's website carefully, you will notice a small obstacle to your pilgrimage: the damned thing isn't actually built yet.

How is a poor sinner to help, you wonder? Well, donations are of course appreciated, as are charter memberships. But if you really want to save our children from the Luciferian cesspool of "evolutionary natural history," why not sign up to pray for the museum? By entering your email address, you'll make a one year commitment to fast one day per month, and pray daily that God will "glorify His name in the specific requests relayed to me."

These specific requests, conveniently available online or by weekly email, are grouped by department. So, for instance, the Warehouse Department makes this request:

Pallet-Wrapping Machine

Department: Warehouse

Purpose: Purchase of a pallet-wrapping machine.

Specifics: Please pray as we look into purchasing a pallet-wrapping machine--that we would find the best price.

Deadline: ASAP

...while Museum Operations asks the following:

Scheduling and Tracking of Museum Projects

Department: Museum Operations

Purpose: To develop a system in an effort to track high-volume tasks for specific projects (i.e., 55 video productions, 160 exhibit areas, etc.)

Specifics: Please pray for the Museum Team to have wisdom and discernment in building the schedule and tracking system to ensure the museum will add areas of each exhibit accurately to portray the intended message and that we can meet our scheduled deadlines.

Deadline: November 30, 2005

...and don't forget Video Production, busily at work on "Fearfully and Wonderfully Made," and thus hoping you'll join them in prayer that the post-production editing will be completed on schedule.

Now, it’s true that those Godless cardiologists up at Harvard may have debunked the whole prayer-speeds-recovery-from-heart-surgery thing. But they can't prove the Almighty won't get you the Kaufman Pallet Master EXPA 25 below invoice, if you ask Him nicely.

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